As I look ahead 2012 is going to be an exciting year for us and we want to share with you 12 action items Lund has in store for the New Year:

January—New look, new website: We’ve already unveiled our new logo thanks to the incredible design work of Harvey|Severance, including a change from  doing business as Lund Family Center to Lund. We will be launching our new website very soon with the help of Eternity Web, Linda Allen and Harvey|Severance.   Stay tuned!

February:  February 9^th Lund staff and board members are participating in Common Good Vermont’s Nonprofit day at the Statehouse. Did you know that Non profits make up 18.7% of Vermont’s Gross State Product annually or that the total Annual revenue of Vermont’s nonprofit sector is 4.6 billion dollars?  (Statistics from Vermont Community Foundation).  Not only do nonprofits help make Vermont a special place they also play a large role in Vermont’s economy!

March: On March 29^th, Lund is hosting an exciting new event called “Heart of the Community”. We’ll honor three leaders in the community that are unsung heroes. This event comes in the midst of National Women’s History Month, so it’s especially appropriate to honor and three very special women in our community.

April— National volunteer month: We are so grateful to our volunteers and have many one time and ongoing volunteer opportunities.

We are excited to be part of Senator’s Leahy’s Farm to Plate Initiative!    What a great way to ensure good nutrition and food for children and families.

Lund holds its phonathon!

May: Lund’s Mother’s Day Bike Ride is a great way to have some fun with your family and friends, start your spring training, or just get out with other members of the community. Join more than 300 cyclists for a family ride or 16, 30 or 55 mile ride through scenic Vermont.

June: Lund’s honoring ceremony is a joyous occasion celebrating the educational successes of our students who have finished a grade level, are graduating from high school, completing their G.E.D. or job training program.

Our Mad Hatters event is back this year.  Another whimsical and fun day for the family.  What a great way to welcome summer.

July: Happy New Year!  Lund’s fiscal year starts July 1^st!    The support we get from our funders, donors and sponsors, as well as from volunteers is a big part of Lund’s budget!  Did you know close to 1 million dollars of Lund’s 6.5 million dollar budget comes from private donations, grants and supporters?  Thank you!   We could not do it without you!

August:  As kids prepare to go back to school,  so many in our community work to make sure that children that Lund serves get started off on the right foot by orchestrating a backpack drive. Charlotte Congregational Church, Citizen’s Bank and Gadhue’s Dry Cleaners have donated hundreds of backpacks and school supplies helping children have the supplies they need to start school.

September—United Way Campaign:  Lund is a proud member of the United Way of Addison and Chittenden Counties.  September is traditionally the United Way kickoff.

National Alcohol and Drug Addiction Recovery Month    Lund works to assure gender specific treatment for pregnant and parenting women, both on an outpatient and residential basis.

The Adoption Picnic is a special time of year for us at Lund.  It’s our annual celebration of adoption and helping creating forever families.

October—Lund’s Staff Appreciation Lund/Staff Awards and Years of Service Awards:  Each year we recognize our staff for their year’s of service, as well as present the annual Elizabeth Lund Employee of the Year Award.   Our staff are what make Lund.  We are thrilled to recognize and appreciate them for all they do.

November: National Adoption Month is a perfect time for us to reflect how adoption has helped us build and strengthen so many families

Thanksgiving is a special  time for us to show our  gratitude for all of the incredible stories we get to witness here at Lund, to our donor and supporters for their generosity, to our staff and volunteers for their work and dedication; and to our clients who every day are inspiration to us.

December—Holiday Giving:  Our community drive to help assure holiday gifts for children and families that Lund serves who would otherwise not have presents.  Our annual appeal, a time when many of our supporters make an annual contribution to support Lund’s work.

]]> http://lundfamilyctr.wordpress.com/2012/01/26/lund-heart-of-the-community-awards/feed/ 0 lundfamilycentervermont HEART_SAVETHEDATE_small http://lundfamilyctr.wordpress.com/2012/01/17/holiday-celebration/ http://lundfamilyctr.wordpress.com/2012/01/17/holiday-celebration/#comments Tue, 17 Jan 2012 17:02:24 +0000 lundfamilycentervermont http://lundfamilyctr.wordpress.com/?p=2114 ]]> Story and Photos by Cat Cutillo

“Ho, ho, ho Merry Christmas!” bellows Santa as he jingles his way into Independence Place immediately launching into “Jingle Bells” and waiving his hands for the mothers and children to sing along.

Quietly, a few voices join in. By the end of the song everyone is singing loudly, and some of the children are dancing.

“I don’t do it to be paid. The pay I get is the joy. If everyone sings jingle bells and they’ve got a smile on their face, it’s a good visit,” says Santa who has been visiting Lund for the past several Decembers and bringing his holiday spirit to nursing homes, schools, private parties and even jails for nearly 50 years throughout the state of Vermont. Working alongside his wife Mrs. Claus, the duo has made up to three-dozen Santa appearances some Decembers.

“I know Santa believes strongly that there is room for the spiritual and the magical part of Christmas,” says Mrs. Claus.

After caroling, Santa invites the children to come take pictures. Proudly, mothers plop their children on Santa’s lap, each child amusing the crowd with a different reaction: some smiling, some stunned, some even a little scared.

“He always says it’s a special privilege for him when these mothers let him hold their newborns,” says Mrs. Claus about Santa.

Lund’s annual holiday parties at both the Residential Treatment Facility on Glen Road, and the independent living facility, Independence Place are always a hit.  And while Santa is quite an opening highlight, the excitement only continues after his departure when staff brings out the hugs bags filled with presents.

“This year we raised over $61,500 in holiday gifts and helped over 500 people. Each donation made a difference in someone’s holiday,” says Alex Brady, Development Coordinator at Lund.

Wide-eyed moms reached into the pile of presents opening up gifts of pots and pans, clothing for their children and other necessities.

“Some of the women certainly have families that are connected and who provide them with a great holidays and there are some women who do not have those natural supports whether their families aren’t healthy or they’re just not involved and so for some of them that was the only Christmas they will have,” says Tammy Santamore, Lund’s Transition Services Coordinator.

And while all the clients love the presents and the party, is can also be a challenging adjustment, sometimes met with mixed emotions.

“The holidays are a really hard time for people and it can be overwhelming to be receiving these gifts from someone’s who’s a total stranger who bought this for you and your child when maybe your own family has never done that,” says Tammy Santamore, Lund’s Transition Services Coordinator. “You can be really happy you’re getting a gift and you can be also be  conflicted that you don’t have  natural supports.”

But Tammy says that adjustment is all part of the journey towards recovery and an important opportunity to change the future.

“To be able to support the women in establishing those traditions for themselves in a safe, healthy, fun way is important. Its important for them to establish these traditions for their child because they report that they want their child to remember a tree and remember opening presents and remember seeing Santa Claus,” says Tammy.

And for Santa and Mrs. Claus, who have three adopted grandchildren, not adopted thru Lund, they say the holiday spirit can be a healing time for everyone.

“Because we all live a little in the magical world and if we don’t we ought to be looking at what we’re doing in the world because we’re missing a lot,” says Mrs. Claus who says despite a ‘light’ year of a dozen Santa appearances, the husband and wife team is already making plans for next year.

“As long as I’m able, I will continue to serve the community,” say Santa. “It’s satisfying to know you’re helping someone in your community.”

When I was seventeen and a freshman in college, I became pregnant. The reaction from my parents was very difficult for me. They were totally non-supportive, completely  uncaring and told me that I would have an abortion and the “problem” would be taken care of quickly.  This was something that I outright refused to allow to happen to my baby.  It was decided by them that I should be “sent away” before I became too obviously pregnant. I was not from Vermont but, through a connection with someone at the University of Vermont, it was decided that I would be sent to the Elizabeth Lund Home in Burlington, VT, to await the birth of my baby and to then relinquish my baby for adoption.

I was “sent away” without being able to speak with any friends who were then told that I had gone to another state to work for my uncle. I spent my time at the Lund home not allowing my feelings, emotions and wishes to be known per strict instructions from my parents. This was a very difficult time in my life as I did feel very alone – there were no family members or friends who I could talk with throughout my entire pregnancy. The Lund home was a very safe haven for me and I was comfortable there. I knew that my unborn baby and I were being very well cared for and that was all that was really important to me then. Given the fact that I was being forced to give up my baby, I was glad to be in the Lund Home and not anywhere near my family during that time.

Photo by Cat Cutillo

During my pregnancy, and my stay at the Elizabeth Lund Home, I was very emotionally attached to my baby and gently rubbed my abdomen while singing and talking softly to my unborn child so that hopefully he would know how much I loved him.  As my due date approached, I became very apprehensive because I knew that once my baby was born that I would have to give him up and walk away. This was very heart-wrenching for me. I did not want to give birth. I wanted him to always be with me. I never wanted to let him go.

As much as I always wanted to be able to keep my baby and to raise him as best I could, I also had to face reality that without any emotional, physical or financial help from anyone that I would be incapable of giving him the life that he so richly deserved.

His birth was a very life-altering experience for me that I will never forget.  He was a beautiful perfect baby and so precious to me.  I felt totally devastated knowing I was giving him away and I didn’t know who his mom and dad would be or where he would be living.  I could only pray that they would love him as much as I did.   After staying at the Lund Home for about six days following my baby’s birth, my parents came to pick me up and take me to yet another state so I could “recover” before going back home.  Even during the long car ride, never a word was spoken about my precious baby.  My parents never inquired as to how I felt and I was never allowed to have any emotions or to ever talk about him again to anyone. This may sound very cold (and it was), but my parents always acted as though my pregnancy was a problem similar to a flat tire on a car – in the beginning it was “how do we fix the problem” and after my baby’s birth, it was “okay, that’s done, let’s go”.

After returning home, trying to go on with my life, acting as if nothing had ever happened, I buried my anguish deep inside of my heart.  No one ever knew the extreme emotional and heartfelt pain that I was going through. I never, for one day of my life, stopped loving my baby boy.   I never stopped hoping that we would someday find each other.

I have gone through all of these many years always wondering where he lived – was he loved enough – did he feel safe and secure  -  was he okay – when did he start walking –  did he walk to school or ride a bus  -  did he have any siblings  –  what were his favorite toys –  what did his laugh sound like –  did he have a girlfriend in high school and did she treat him well.  Most importantly, was he happy.  I wondered if he enjoyed sports as much as I did, and if so, in what sports did he participate.   As the years passed, I wondered if he had married – I always wondered what his personality was like and did he have my silly sense of humor.  The questions about him were constantly in my mind.  I always wanted to know if he ever knew anything about me and I wondered if he ever knew how much I loved him. He was, and always has been, on my mind and always deep within my heart.

Photo by Cat Cutillo

At the time I relinquished my much loved baby boy for adoption, I was told that his birth records would be permanently sealed forever. Unfortunately, I never knew that Vermont had changed their law. I never knew that the Vermont Adoption Registry existed or that there may be a way for us to ever find each other again. I spent countless amount of hours and days and months and years trying to discover if there was ever a boy born on his birth date at the Elizabeth Lund Home who was looking for his birth mother.

I went on with my life but never felt complete. There was always a very empty feeling in my heart. I married and had two more children but no child can ever replace the one who was lost.

In March of this year I spent several days with two good friends of mine from high school.  One of these friends is an adoptee herself and the other one has an adopted son.  One of them had recently learned of the son I had given up for adoption.  Through hours of conversation, the one who had been adopted offered to try to help me locate my lost son as she had been helping many others since she had searched for her birth parents. The one who had adopted a son also encouraged me to try to locate him.  She always felt it was important, and in fact encouraged and supported her adopted son, to find his birth mother which he did.  They both encouraged me to search for mine knowing that I needed desperately to at least find out if he was okay even if I was denied any access to him and to hopefully get the answers to all of the many questions I had kept inside. I had never wanted to intrude into his life or make contact with him unless it was something he was searching for. That would not be something I would ever do. That, to me, should always be the adoptee’s choice to make. Both of my friends totally agreed with my feelings and my perspective.  I do admit to having had a fear that he held animosity towards me and would reject me if we did ever meet again.  Even if that were to happen, I would feel better knowing that he was doing alright.  That would bring some peace to me.

Upon returning home from our get-together, I started to look up the Elizabeth Lund Home and discovered the Lund Family Center. I don’t know why I never thought to do this before. I was still assuming that his records were permanently sealed and I would never have any access to his identifying information or any other information about him.

I immediately emailed someone at the Lund Family Center and quickly received a reply from Christina Shuma who is with both the Lund Family Center and the Vermont Adoption Registry. It was through Christina that I learned of the Vermont Adoption Registry. She is an angel in my life and I am so very thankful for her. She explained how the Vermont Adoption Registry worked and about the registry papers I would need to complete and submit to her. Once I did that, she would research as to whether my son had ever registered.

Then long days went by as I waited to hear anything.  Christina apparently had to locate him and confirm whether or not he still was interested in contact with me.   Shortly thereafter, I received the most incredible life-changing phone call from Christina telling me that he had registered many, many years before and he was still interested in contact with me.  I was shaking and having trouble concentrating on what she was telling me.  I know I was in total shock.  At that point, Christina asked me if I was sure I really wanted a reunion with him.  Christina ever so compassionately, and with great care, made sure that both of us really wanted to go forward. She then gave him my email address. He sent a short message and in it he stated that he held no animosity toward me. That opened my floodgates and brought to me the biggest relief that I had ever felt in my life.  He then called me the next day and we talked for two hours. I cannot begin to explain my emotions and feelings at that exact time – a true miracle had just happened in my life and I didn’t know quite how to handle it – it was total excitement mixed with a roller coaster ride where your insides are all churning and your heart is pounding.

Very shortly after our initial phone contact, I sent my son some family background – grandparents information, the countries his ancestors had come from, some information about me, etc. We had one and two hour phone conversations almost daily until I offered to fly to where he lived for our first face-to-face reunion. This reunion occurred 17 days after our initial contact. I flew to where he lived by myself. He was alone at the airport when I arrived. Because of the many, many lengthy phone calls and emails between us, I felt instantly and completely comfortable with him. It was a great feeling. We really liked each other from the very beginning.

That first hug in the airport was something I had waited for decades to give and to receive and it felt absolutely wonderful. His smile, his warmth and his acceptance of me was the most incredible gift.  I stayed in a hotel even though he had offered for me to stay at his house. My friend, who had been adopted and found a birth brother, advised me to do that as we would both need some private time over the course of that first weekend. We took long walks through the woods and talked. We sat on a large rock by the edge of a river while I told him everything about my pregnancy — about my time in college when I knew I was pregnant and was going to be sent to the Lund Home – about my time at the Lund Home. I wanted him to know anything and everything about his life before birth, during birth and after his birth. I told him from the beginning to feel totally comfortable with asking me any questions he may have and that I would answer them all. I wanted him to know how much I always loved him and why I had to relinquish him for adoption and how excrutiatingly painful that was for me to do.

It has been wonderful for me to hear him tell me about his life - where he has lived, both in and out of this country, over the years and why –  his many experiences –  his ups and downs –  his times as a child and all the years thereafter. We never seem to run out of anything to say to each other or to ask each other -  I’m sure that will never stop.   The more time we spend talking or spending precious time together, the more there are strong similarities we see in each other  -  not necessarily physical appearance but personalities, likes and dislikes, sense of humor, thoughts and perspectives.  My son is an extremely kind and caring man with a tremendous heart and I am so very grateful to have him back in my life.

Not long after our reconnection, Christina Shuma sent me a 5 ½ x 8 ¼ inch card with my son’s original left and right footprints with my right index fingerprint in between.  Also on this card is his weight and length at birth. These prints were taken the day after his birth. I will always treasure this and it will always bring tears from my heart.  Christina also sent me the Probate Court Report full of information along with the relinquishment papers. Christina told me that I would have received a copy of the relinquishment papers at the time they were signed but I have never had them. My parents must have destroyed them.

Since that time, he has been down to where I live twice and I have been to see him again. We live about 9 hours by car away from each other. The distance that we live apart is our only enemy now. We have never slowed down on the constant phone conversations. He is coming to my place for a long Thanksgiving weekend and we both are anxiously awaiting that time together again.  I always felt that he is the one meeting an entire blood family he has never known so we have taken meeting his brother and sister and their families very slowly. My other two children and I have known each other since they were born. He has never known any of us. On one of his trips to my home, he did meet my other two grown children (his sister and brother) but not their spouses or children. I did that intentionally as it would have been way too much too fast for him. When he comes for Thanksgiving weekend, he will meet their spouses and their children (his nieces and nephew), but he will also have the opportunity to spend one-on-one time with his sister and the same with his brother. We are all excitedly looking forward to his trip here. He is very wanted in this family.

Through continuous one and two hour phone calls, constant emails, and in-person times together, we have built an incredible bond and a very caring relationship.  We are now creating our own “memories”.  This has been a truly beautiful journey for both of us.  I truly love my newly re-discovered son.

There is no way that I can ever thank Christina Shuma, the Lund Family Center and the Vermont Adoption Registry enough for bringing us together. Christina has been extremely professional yet compassionate, caring and wonderful to both my son and to me. We will never forget her.

My life-long dream has finally come true. Miracles do happen.

______________________________________________________________________________________________________

ADOPTED SON’S STORY

I have known all my life that I was adopted; in fact, I was so young that I can’t remember being told.  I was raised by loving parents who provided me with everything that I needed and I love them the same as they love me. This is my story.

When I was very young I did ask my parents, “Why was I adopted?” and at first they didn’t have an answer for me.  I must have surprised them with this but my father later explained some of the reasons why children are adopted but he didn’t know the exact reason why I was put up for adoption.  That was the last time I remember ever asking questions about my adoption out loud.  That didn’t mean I did not have questions.   I had plenty of them.  All my life I thought about it, some of the times were worse than others.  There were triggers to these questions:  thoughts and emotions and sometimes I didn’t need a trigger, I would just ponder over it.  Some of these triggers were birthdays (not just mine), family reunions and trips to the doctor’s.

Photo by Noelle Bonneau

My family consisted of the five of us, my Mother, Father, two siblings and myself.  One of my siblings was also adopted.  The other was not.  My parents treated us all the same and never once did I hear any remark about adoption or see any kind of favoritism.  I had a normal childhood and did all things that young boys like to do.  I liked playing outside, played a lot of sports and spent some of my summers at a camp.  My relationship with my siblings was normal, although we are all about five years apart in age from each other.  We lived in a nice community with other kids within walking distance and open places to play.

When I was in my preteen years (about twelve) my extended family, led by my father, started studying genealogy and building a family tree dating back generations.  Over the holidays we had the normal family get together and the family members that had done some of the research got everyone to sit down and learn what was found.  I had never felt so out of place before in my life.   I wasn’t sure I should have even been there.  This was about the same time my father was getting us ready for a sabbatical overseas for a year.  This required an extensive trip to the doctor’s office with many shots, a physical and a medical history sheet for me to get into school overseas.  I was in the office when my mother had to explain why I did not have any family medical history and why my birth certificate was different and not completed for almost a year after I was born.  She had to supply more documentation before I was approved to get my passport and some kind of student acceptance form.  These events did little to help my state of mind.

After returning from overseas, I started to become rebellious and with each passing year this became worse.  In high school I started to hang out with the “wrong” crowd, partying and staying out late and didn’t worry about consequences (there were few).  After my seventeenth birthday I suffered a huge personal loss that sent me over the edge and made me impossible to handle.  My parents tried counseling but I wasn’t listening to anyone.  Later I dropped out of high school and started to work as a dishwasher and prep for a local restaurant.  After getting into more serious trouble, I decided that it was time for me to leave home and find a new direction.  So I went into the local recruiters’ office and enlisted into the Military.  Twenty-four hours later I was at the recruit depot and my life started to change in a big hurry.  While in the service I did go to night school and completed my credits and received my high school diploma. What I learned in the Military has served me well for the rest of my life.

When I received my honorable discharge,I started my career in manufacturing.  I went to college for two years to learn more and gain access to higher paying jobs and did well in the manufacturing arena.  During this time I had little contact with my adoptive family but did spend quiet time thinking about all of the questions I still had from my childhood that never went away.  In the nineties I was burned out from working too much and was starting to lose my way.  It was then I decided to move and change my direction again.

After moving, I started a completely new career, started to have a little more contact with my family and more so with my sister who was also adopted.  I finally started to speak to her about how I felt about my adoption and some of the thoughts, questions and emotions I was experiencing.  She told me that she was going through some of same things and suggested I put my name and contact information on the Vermont Adoption Registry that she had discovered.  I didn’t know at that time that was an option and knew that I really needed to register.  The thought of being able to answer some of my questions and maybe even meet a blood relative was exciting to me.  When I did register I found out that my birth mother had not registered.  At that time I was supplied with all of the non-identifying information that I was allowed to have. I learned that my birth mother was young and had to give me up, not by her choice, and I was given other minimal information.   Somehow that did make me feel a little better about things but did wish that there was contact information.

The information that I received from Lund was helpful for some questions but did bring on more and a big desire for contact. For almost 12 years I went about my life and made more changes and had moved again, this time back to the state where I was raised. During this time, I had divorced and remarried and changed jobs again.  Life was okay but I seemed to always be missing something and was unable to become close to my adoptive family.  Even though I had people around me, I always seemed to feel alone and still wasn’t sure where I belonged.

Then one day out of the blue, I came home from work and there was a message on my answer machine.  I went about my normal after-work stuff and then went over to the answer machine to hear the message and what I heard made my heart skip a beat.  It was the from the Vermont Adoption Registry looking for me.  This was at 4:30 on June 17, 2011.  I returned the call and reached a kind woman, Christina Shuma.  She asked me a few questions and told me the best news I have had in my life.  My birth mother had contacted the registry, was hoping for contact and wanted to provide me with medical history.   I told Christina that yes, I did still feel the same way as when I registered back in 1999, and it was okay to provide my birth mother with my contact information.   Not thinking clearly when speaking with Christina, I hung up the phone with my head going in a hundred different directions and then I kicked myself for not asking for my birth mother’s contact information.  So, I tried to call Christina back but, of course, it was after five and she had gone home for the weekend.  That made for the longest weekend in my life, but thought to myself that I would just find out on Monday.  Well, Christina didn’t work on Monday so I waited until Tuesday and was then able to speak with her.  Christina gave me the information I asked for.  I asked her some questions and she gave me some good advice on how to proceed.

I took Christina’s suggestions and sat down at my computer and wrote my first e-mail to my birth mother.  It was short but I let her know the door was open.  I think I checked for a response about once a minute for two hours and got my first reply that literally started the first day of the rest of my life.  My first reaction to receiving a response was a flood of over forty years of emotions that just poured out.  I could not believe it.  My birth mother, the one person I thought about all of my life, was e-mailing me.

It was very important to me to let her know from the beginning that I held no ill feelings or resentment toward her and that I really did want to communicate with her.  After a few e-mails, she sent me her phone number and said that it was okay to call her.  On June 21 at 4:30 pm I spoke to her for the first time.  What a good feeling!  We talked for about two hours and told each other that this was what we both wanted.  That phone call was just the first of countless more that would go on for hours and continue to this day.  During one of these early-on phone calls we both talked about wanting to meet each other face-to-face.  Then she made me very happy and took the bold step of suggesting that she fly to my local airport and stay at a hotel for a couple of days.  On July 8th, at 8:25 am, I watched my birthmother walk off the plane and two minutes later I got the best hug of my life.  We spent the next couple of days talking, laughing and crying and going for walks.  That was a weekend I will never forget.  She told me everything I wanted to know and even the things that must have been very difficult for her to tell and I did the same for her.

In one of the earlier phone calls she told me she had two other grown children after me and that they lived in her area.  She had to sit down with them and tell them all about me.  After her meeting with them she immediately called all excited to tell me of their complete acceptance.  I was thrilled with the news.  They both wanted to meet me and I wanted to meet them.   They are my blood related half-sister and half-brother or as we all prefer to say, “sister” and “brother”.   We exchanged e-mails and they both sent me pictures of themselves and their families.  A few weeks later my birthmother and I talked about me going there and meeting my sister and my brother and spending some more time with her and to meet her husband.

I flew to my birth mother’s for a weekend.  I have to admit that I was quite nervous.  I was also feeling overwhelmed about meeting, for the first time, with my newly discovered siblings but my birth mother helped me to feel good about it all.  My sister and my brother came separately about twenty minutes apart and were very nice, made me feel welcomed and we talked for some time.

It has been five months now since I first reunited with my birth mother and it has been such an awesome experience.  It was my dream to meet my birth mother; but to meet her and enjoy my time with her and just really like her as not only my birth mother, but also such a great friend, is more than I ever could have dreamt was possible.  Through these last five months I have had the chance to know her and spend time with her.  Now I look forward to getting to know my sister and my brother better over Thanksgiving weekend.   The only struggle that I have had to endure through this is the distance between us.

The ceiling is often the last thing you notice when you walk into a room unless that room happens to be the infant room at Lund’s Early Childhood Program, which has recently added several new mobiles floating with butterflies, paper birds and gems courtesy of Hampton Direct’s Laura Gibson.

Photo by Cat Cutillo

“Some of the babies can’t crawl yet. The only way they can change their environment is by looking around the room.  It’s important for them to have different things to look at instead of just staring at a blank ceiling,” says Donna Walter, Lund’s Early Childhood Teacher.

Although a self-proclaimed non-crafter, Laura was the mastermind behind these latest mobile creations. She says seeing the look of sheer pleasure on the children’s faces as she walked in with the mobiles was priceless.

“The smiles on their faces as they were looking at them and trying to grab them–it was wonderful and so heartwarming.  And once we had them up it really brightened up the room,” recalls Laura.

Hampton Direct encourages every employee to give eight hours of time to volunteering, and they strive to get 100% employee participation. Laura credits her company’s philanthropic philosophy as her inspiration.

“It’s so great to work for a company that’s so behind the community,” says Laura who plans to continue volunteering at Lund and recently participated in Lund’s Holiday Giving Program.

Laura says the experience has not only given her a new vantage point for her creative abilities, it’s given her a newfound love for her glue gun.

“I’ve never used a glue gun before and now I love my glue gun. I want to glue everything in sight,” she laughs.

If you would like to be matched with a volunteer opportunity at Lund please contact Alex Brady at 802-861-2585 or alexb@lundfamilycenter.org.

Photo by Cat Cutillo

Hampton Direct's Laura Gibson with Lund's Childcare Coordinator Judy Harvey/ Courtesy Photo

Every Wednesday at 3:00 PM Gisele Kloeckner takes a break from her job as the Vice President of Commercial Banking at TD Bank and drives over to Lund’s childcare in South Burlington, where she slides off her business shoes and curls up on the carpet with a children’s book and a group of toddlers.

“It’s a nice change of pace after working at the bank.  When I go there it’s very calming and soothing to sit down with the kids and read books with them,” says Gisele who began volunteering in childcare because she missed reading to her two daughters who are now older. Her employer and manager encourage her to do it. In fact, TD Bank sponsors a reading program every summer where kids earn $10 when they read 10 books.

“The bank encourages financial literacy and literacy as a whole so I just keep it going all year long versus just in the summer,” says Giselle.

She’s not there very long. Maybe 10 minutes, but the kids love it and have even been known to greet her with ‘Gigi’s here, Gigi’s here!’

“Even though she’s not here that much, she’s a fixture in their routine. I feel really lucky that she’s is willing to drive and stay here for just a few minutes,” says Lund’s Childcare Coordinator Judy Harvey who explains that originally Giselle had planned to read for 30 minutes but because toddlers are so hard to keep focused for that long she adjusts her time based on the needs of the children.

Gisele says it recharges her.

“My mother always says my two girls are her vitamins. You know what, those little guys are my vitamins,” says Gisele.

And while she’s curled up on the floor with a handful of pint-size listeners sitting around her (or even on her) she thinks of an old friend from high school who she wishes could have received Lund’s services.

“I think of her a lot while I’m there. I’ve not seen her since she dropped out of high school in the 10^th grade,” says Gisele. “I often wonder what happened to her. I know that it’s been a tough life for her and I know that Lund would have made her life so different had she had the opportunity.”

Ten minutes later, when the kids have hopped off her lap making a beeline for snack time, Gisele closes the book, slips out the door and heads back to work.

“I think everybody should have an organization that they volunteer with –or more than one. Because it’s easy to be caught up in your own little world and I think when you volunteer and you see other people’s worlds you’re more thankful for your blessings.”

She has also donated half a dozen of her hand-made quilts to Lund’s childcare leaving the tots something to snuggle up with long after she’s left.

Gisele hopes her time at Lund will create even bigger ripples, extending a brighter future into the lives of women who are now at the intersection where her old high school friend once stood.

“I just know that Lund would have made such an huge impact on her life back then. Like they do everyday with a lot of women now, a lot of families, a lot of kids.”

If you would like to volunteer at Lund please contact Alex Brady at 802-861-2585 or alexb@lundfamilycenter.org.

Parenting was something Kevin and Kim Hamilton had always wanted. Even their chosen professions as an assistant principal and a kindergarten teacher reflected their desires to be around children.  But conceiving a baby was just not possible.

“It was really tough. We see kids everyday and parents everyday who shouldn’t have kids. It would get so frustrating and we’d think what is wrong with us? Why can’t we have kids”?

After spending tons of emotions and money on infertility treatments, the Hamiltons decided to look into adoption with Lund Family Center.

“I didn’t go [into adoption] thinking that this is going to be this great big wonderful experience and the child is going to become my own. I went in there thinking we’re settling and this is what we have to do because life has given us such a kick in the butt,” says Kim.

Lund’s Adoption Director Wanda Audette says people can experience a lot of emotions when faced with infertility.

“They went through what so many people do. Some adoptive parents get that sense of anger and frustration of ‘what did they do wrong’ and ‘why can’t they have a child in that way’. The message we always give is that families are made and joined in many different ways and for whatever reasons your family is supposed to be joined through adoption.  It’s not going to matter once you have your baby in your arms. Lots of times people don’t believe it until they experience it,” says Audette.

Kim soon began embracing the support groups that Lund offers and says that helped her feel less alone.

“It was good to talk to other couples in the same situation and feel their pain. So many other people are in the same situation,” says Kim.

But nothing made the waiting any easier. It had been a long road for Kevin and Kim. In fact, their 20^th wedding anniversary was fast approaching and they still felt like their family was incomplete. Then, just days before their anniversary, they received the most perfect gift: A birth mother had selected them as the adoptive parents. The baby was due in just three months. However, this was going to be the longest three months of their lives. The birth father was considering the idea of parenting and the Hamiltons knew things could change on a dime.

“That was a little nerve-wracking, but a few people  have said to me, ‘Well, that’s your labor. That’s what you have to go through before your baby comes to you,” says Kim.

Finally, in the middle of a June night, the Hamiltons got the call that the birth mother was in labor.

“She handed him over to me and I was just overcome with emotion and crying and my husband, who doesn’t cry very often, held him and cried too,” remembers Kim.

They named him Finn and asked the birth parents to pick his middle name, James, so that he would always have a part of their legacy.

“Since Finn has come into our lives it’s just been amazing. Our house is always a mess,” laughs Kim. “We feel luckier than people who have biological children. We feel like we have such a special story and it just makes him that much more special to us because of how hard we worked to get him and to have a family.”

Now, every year Kim and Kevin look forward to the Adoption Picnic Lund hosts where they get to see the people from their support group who now all have children. And Kim couldn’t be happier with where life’s ‘kick in the butt’ has landed her.

“Everyday I’m thankful for him. We look back and say, ‘Can you imagine our life without him?’ We feel like we appreciate him so much more because of how he came to be,” says Kim.

Jenn and Todd Belter tried to have a child for four years before turning to adoption. After spending a year with one agency that didn’t work out, they went to Lund Family Center.

“They were such a good match for us,” says Jenn Belter. “When you’re having one of those hard days, they know how to make you feel better. They’re really reassuring.”

Lund’s Adoption Director, Wanda Audette, prepares clients that adopting an infant can take 1-5 years and in most cases the birth mother will select adoptive parents.

The Belters say waiting to be selected was the hardest part. Jen soothed her mind by slowly getting the baby room together and painting a mural on the wall, trying to give herself a visual reminder that a baby would be coming. She just had to wait for the right one.

“It’s so hard to wait, especially after a really long time. It just feels like it’s too good to be true. You’re not really sure it’s going to happen,” remembers Jenn.

After a year and a half with Lund, the phone call that would change their lives finally came. They had been picked by a birth mother and were given just two days notice before they would meet their baby.

“I just started crying. I was so happy. I couldn’t believe we actually had a baby after 6.5 years,” says Jenn.

Surprisingly, they learned they had a lot in common with the birth mother from the foods they liked to the name they had picked: John.

“The birth mother was calling him ‘Levi John’ and the foster family that had him for the month decided he looked more like a ‘John’ so they’d been called him John,” said Jen. “Which is the name we had picked out.”

Strangely, Levi had also been a consideration for the Belters. They decided his full name would be ‘John Henry Levi Belter.’

“When the birth mother handed John to my wife, that was just amazing at that moment. You can’t explain it,” says Todd.

Now, 6 months later, Todd and Jenn are savoring every minute with John.

“He’s almost growing up too fast,” says Todd. “When he gets up in the morning, when he first sees you, just the smile and noises he makes—it’s amazing.”

“I think a lot of people worry when they adopt if they’re going to love the baby as if they had given birth (to him), and you just do. You love the baby so much it’s unbelievable,” says Jenn. “He was always meant to be ours.”

“Gratitude is the inward feeling of kindness received. Thankfulness is the natural impulse to express that feeling. Thanksgiving is the following of that impulse.”
Henry Van Dyke

“Gratitude is when memory is stored in the heart and not in the mind.”
Lionel Hampton

“If you count all your assets, you always show a profit.” Robert Quillen

“Most human beings have an almost infinite capacity for taking things for granted.” Aldous Huxley

I could concentrate my column this issue on the greater than ever challenge it is to run a human services nonprofit in these times- greater need,  tough economic times that translate to fewer government and grant dollars, increased costs.  The worry that it will get worse before it gets better.  Surely, one could see my job through a “glass is half empty” mentality. Not only is that not helpful, but it actually makes matters worse and isn’t productive or useful.   Lund’s work and mission are more important now than ever before and children and families are counting on us to be there for them.

I prefer to think about the many ways that I am grateful for all the good that people are doing to help children thrive.  First, I must say, Lund would not exist if it were not for the incredible efforts, support, and work of so many people.

To recognize the “generosity of spirit” that makes Lund able to do what we do and have done for over 120 years, thanks to this generosity of spirit.

Thanksgiving and nearing the end of 2011, give me extra reason to pause, ever so briefly, as well as reflect on all that I am grateful for as the Executive Director of Lund.

I want to thank everyone who has been there for our clients and mission.  My gratitude to:

Our Volunteers: I am thankful for the more than 600 hundred volunteers who have donated more than 10 thousand hours to Lund during the past year.  That’s a lot of time and talent! Volunteers helped out in so many ways- reading to children in our child care, organizing activities for our residents, face painting at our adoption picnic, stuffing envelopes, planning and orchestrating our fundraising events, serving on committees, as well as helping in so many ways.   At times the work they did was less than glamorous- such as cleaning up after an event or washing dishes after a holiday meal for clients.  We are grateful to each of our volunteers for being there when we needed them and for helping to make a difference.    Your time and energy are a precious gift to us.  A special thanks to our volunteer Board Members.  This dedicated group of volunteers spends countless hours each year serving in their capacity as a board member, and frequently go above and beyond, volunteering in addition to fulfilling their board duties.   I have extreme gratitude for each of our volunteers making the time in their busy and full lives to make a difference at Lund.

Our Lund Employees: Day in and day out (and for many staff it’s night in and night out), holiday or not, Lund staff are working to help children thrive.   I am thankful for Lund’s 100 employees that go the extra mile, to makes sure families and children have the support they need.  Our staff is the heart and soul of Lund Family Center and every day I am proud to work with them.  Their commitment to our mission and work is truly remarkable.  I am grateful to our staff for their dedication, passion and hard work.

Our Donors and funders: This year, more than ever, I am thankful for the donors who invest in our work through financial contributions and the donations of goods and services. I am grateful for our corporate donors, foundation and government funders, the United Ways, and of course our many individual donors.  I am extremely grateful to the incredible groups that support us, including our PINS partner, the Charlotte Congregational Church.  To our many donors, whether you are supporting us through a grant, a monthly donation, a bike ride team, donating diapers, holiday gifts, or money, you make our work possible. We are grateful for your investment in Lund and for your generosity.   We for sure could not do what we do without your support. It does make a huge and lasting difference in the lives of children and families.

Our clients:  I am grateful, humbled and inspired every day by the people we work with.  I am in awe of the perseverance and determination of the families we are working with and the hard work that our clients are doing to help ensure that their children have a brighter future.  You are what drives me to do what I do.

Our Collaborative partners (from both the private and public sectors) – I am proud to work in Vermont where our colleagues care about the greater good and our community.   I am grateful to my colleagues who are such great mentors, advisors and resources.   My colleagues are some of the most talented, smart and passionate people I have had the pleasure of working with.   I feel blessed to know them and have such great role models.  We are lucky to have such a great nonprofit community in our state, as well as dedicated state and federal partners.    To our legislators in Montpelier and our Congressional Delegation in Washington, thank you for all you do for children and families in Vermont.  I cannot think of a place where I would rather be doing this work.

This Melody Beattie quote seems like a fitting way to end my column:
“Gratitude makes sense of our past, brings peace for today, and creates a vision for tomorrow.”

With my sincere gratitude and best wishes to you-

Barbara

Judy Harvey, Childcare Coordinator, was awarded “Employee of the Year” at the October All-Staff Retreat.

“This year’s recipient is truly a leader, an innovator, a motivator and an inspiration and yet she is likely one of the most humble people you will ever meet,” said Kim Coe, Director of Residential and Community Treatment, during the award presentation.

Staff erupted into applause when Harvey’s name was called and everyone stood in cheer as she made her way up to the podium to receive a sling of sunflowers, a gift and a plaque to commemorate her award.

“I have no doubt that she would move mountains, fight lions, tigers, and bears if that is what it took to protect a child and yet she has a gentle spirit that comforts those around her,” said Coe.

Harvey has worked at Lund Family Center for six years and is recognized as a leader in early childhood education. She received the Rising Star award from the KidSafe Collaborative.  A child advocate and educator, Harvey understands the best practice for working with families in poverty and is a role model.

“It’s overwhelming, there’s just so many people doing outstanding work. It was a huge surprise and a huge honor,” said Harvey who credits her staff for the award. “My staff is incredible. I got the award but it would not have happened without them. These things don’t happen in isolation, they happen because of the staff that surrounds you. I’m their leader but they’re my leaders too.”